Run Retard........ Run
After 
watching Bill Richardson finally bow out of the race.. with the patten "i don't know but you must really like me since you ask me all these questions" smile and stare... and then squirm while being asked who he would throw is support to.... wait.. wait.. wait... lets back up here.... ... Bill Richardson dropped out.... ok... who really thought he was going to make a dent... this is the same guy who claims to love the Boston Red Sox but dreams of being in Yankee pinstripes... really didn't we all know then?...
(a little hint for Bill next time he runs: ...pssssssst Bill.. illegal puerto ricans and arabs that live in NYC can't vote.. and everyone outside of NYC hates the yankees.. next time choose the red sox)
With Bill bowing out and Fred losing his friends.. and others to follow until we are down to the big boys... .....how pissed would you be if donated money to a no chance canadiate and they didn't even finish the race... ... not to mention why in the hell you would throw money away like that... the least they could do is finish and not give up..
Did they guilt you into donating money.. like how you feel guilty for the retard running 100m dash in the Special Olympics.... so you buy him some Nike track shoes and running gear... knowning full well this retard isn't going to come close to winning ...because he's that retard with a clump of red hair on his head.. who doesn't run much because he would rather chew his own tongue and its hard to balance himself upright with a baby arm and adjacent baby leg..... but you think "Awwwwwwww damnit just because he doesn't have a chance he should get to run so he can feel good about himself"
So you spend some money... get in the stands.. get your self some nachos and a coke.... (which by the way if your ever at the Special Olympics i recommend bringing your own food.... really... a note the special food commitee .. we in the stands.. we would like to let you know we're not retarded... our tastebuds have evolved fully... we can taste the your 80% water off brand left over cheese dip that Gary "made"... and for the record i threw that hot dog in the trash that Gary handled... you shouldn't have retards handle food.. its unsanitary.. nothing againist you Gary.. i thought your insight into various trumpet noises and hand gnawing was hilarious... i just don't want to catch your diseases..) ............. ............ So you get in the stands to cheer for him... only to watch him run about 10m .. start to chew his tongue and waive back to the crowd.. smiling and chewing... stop and find a rock to play with.. then sit indian style with his rock on the track.. bite his tongue and shit himself... ........ .....at least he didn't get any on those shoes... he can keeps those for the next race........ ... and all you want to do is stand up and shout
"GET UP YOU FUCKING RETARD!!! THOSE NIKE WIND RESISTANT SHORTS COST ME $50.. PICK UP YOUR SHIT...AND FINISH THIS FUCKING RACE..."
..........so....... for those of you dontated to the total $18,699,937 for Bill or the $12,828,111 for Fred to run their race... and and not have the balls to demand he finish it or for your money back... lets look at some of the things you all could have collectivly done with that money instead... (feel free to add in the comments)
The Kansas City Royals
the infamous Jessica Simpson cabo wabo gravy panties
Quebec from Canada only to offically change the offical language to English and ban the word croissant
A lobby in Washington DC to rid America of clowns.. we'll call D.U.P.... unless anyone else has a better group name
John Stossel's moustache and glue it to Elizabeth Vargas's snatch and make her give the news with her snatch
Bill Richardson and Fred Thompson some Nike running gear and a marathon coach
18,699,937 rammen noodles and 12,828,111 Jack-n-box tacos
or keep it for the recession
so for those of you that invested $$ in retards still running and you feel they might stop and shit themseleves... just have the balls to tell that retard to keep running... all they need is postivie enouragement.... its not like your getting your money back
watching Bill Richardson finally bow out of the race.. with the patten "i don't know but you must really like me since you ask me all these questions" smile and stare... and then squirm while being asked who he would throw is support to.... wait.. wait.. wait... lets back up here.... ... Bill Richardson dropped out.... ok... who really thought he was going to make a dent... this is the same guy who claims to love the Boston Red Sox but dreams of being in Yankee pinstripes... really didn't we all know then?... (a little hint for Bill next time he runs: ...pssssssst Bill.. illegal puerto ricans and arabs that live in NYC can't vote.. and everyone outside of NYC hates the yankees.. next time choose the red sox)
and now Fred Thompson quiting the race... again.. did you ever have a chance.. maybe maybe if you ran in the
early 90's and rode the Days of Thunder Die Hard II and Cape Fear wave.. strike when the iron was hot Fred.. shit man.. that's Tom Cruise, Bruce Willis, and De Niro at your campaigns... but no you decided to milk it on Law & Order and you sucked on the tit to long... you lost your edge Fred.. and now you lost your friends..... but before you go.. please... tell us how you nabbed Jeri Thompsom.... meet her in TN... knew she was obcessed with rasins?...
With Bill bowing out and Fred losing his friends.. and others to follow until we are down to the big boys... .....how pissed would you be if donated money to a no chance canadiate and they didn't even finish the race... ... not to mention why in the hell you would throw money away like that... the least they could do is finish and not give up..
Did they guilt you into donating money.. like how you feel guilty for the retard running 100m dash in the Special Olympics.... so you buy him some Nike track shoes and running gear... knowning full well this retard isn't going to come close to winning ...because he's that retard with a clump of red hair on his head.. who doesn't run much because he would rather chew his own tongue and its hard to balance himself upright with a baby arm and adjacent baby leg..... but you think "Awwwwwwww damnit just because he doesn't have a chance he should get to run so he can feel good about himself"
So you spend some money... get in the stands.. get your self some nachos and a coke.... (which by the way if your ever at the Special Olympics i recommend bringing your own food.... really... a note the special food commitee .. we in the stands.. we would like to let you know we're not retarded... our tastebuds have evolved fully... we can taste the your 80% water off brand left over cheese dip that Gary "made"... and for the record i threw that hot dog in the trash that Gary handled... you shouldn't have retards handle food.. its unsanitary.. nothing againist you Gary.. i thought your insight into various trumpet noises and hand gnawing was hilarious... i just don't want to catch your diseases..) ............. ............ So you get in the stands to cheer for him... only to watch him run about 10m .. start to chew his tongue and waive back to the crowd.. smiling and chewing... stop and find a rock to play with.. then sit indian style with his rock on the track.. bite his tongue and shit himself... ........ .....at least he didn't get any on those shoes... he can keeps those for the next race........ ... and all you want to do is stand up and shout "GET UP YOU FUCKING RETARD!!! THOSE NIKE WIND RESISTANT SHORTS COST ME $50.. PICK UP YOUR SHIT...AND FINISH THIS FUCKING RACE..."
but you don't because ..
A. you don't want anyone to know that's your tard...
B. it isn't the proper conduct to yell at them or expect them to finish...... .... so you sit there with everyone else as your baby legged tard moans in pain as he rolls around in his own shit... the track officals give him an honorable DQ blue ribbon for trying and wheelbarrow him off the track to applause... and hugs
..........so....... for those of you dontated to the total $18,699,937 for Bill or the $12,828,111 for Fred to run their race... and and not have the balls to demand he finish it or for your money back... lets look at some of the things you all could have collectivly done with that money instead... (feel free to add in the comments)
teeth for everyone in Alabama
The Kansas City Royals
the infamous Jessica Simpson cabo wabo gravy panties
Quebec from Canada only to offically change the offical language to English and ban the word croissant
A lobby in Washington DC to rid America of clowns.. we'll call D.U.P.... unless anyone else has a better group name
John Stossel's moustache and glue it to Elizabeth Vargas's snatch and make her give the news with her snatch
Bill Richardson and Fred Thompson some Nike running gear and a marathon coach
18,699,937 rammen noodles and 12,828,111 Jack-n-box tacos
or keep it for the recession
so for those of you that invested $$ in retards still running and you feel they might stop and shit themseleves... just have the balls to tell that retard to keep running... all they need is postivie enouragement.... its not like your getting your money back
posted by Johnny Menace at 8:36 PM
21 comments
