The 05' Menace blog in review
So its not an entire year but its The 05' Menace blog in review. Why not start with highlights of the months
June - The first posting I think is apporiate when greeting yourself to stangers to just comeout and so a picture of you getting hammered. You know.. "Hi I'm Menace here's a picture of how much i can drink, what i like to drink, what i look like when i drink..... wanna go get some drinks?"(readers would later learn that is my only pair of clothes)..... Also in June i teach everyone how to protect themselves from sharks. ..... Perdita hints that she might be on acid "At one point I thought a shark was gonna get me through the monitor. I was wondering why else it would be wet."
July - One of my best months of blogging. I educate the masses on the birth of the 4th of July and what a soapie is. Pissed off no-l (apparantly people were sensitive about Hurricanes) Acutioned off my friend Tombo in "Win a date with Tombo" to Mel (i think that date is suppose to happen in 4 weeks... i'll have to check with tombo and the wound has healed into a nice scar). Had my first edition TV dad fight night, Bundy vs Tanner (one of my favorite post of this year by far) We all found out who was fucking Gibbler after that.... thanks Buttah for adding on "FINE! get over here, whip it out and let me do my thang.jesus. so demanding.who hasn't fucked gilber?
August - All i was thinking about that year was vacation. I went to Puerto Vallerta.... Not much going on. I remember claiming you could save the world and clone gas....... hmmmmmm.... same month I talked about rubbing veggie dip on your nuts while watching Roger Rabbit... Puerto will do strange things to you.. all i can say is Ricea... But i will highlight the love spat between white devil and larin von smartass in this post... love was in the air.
September - My first edition of Mom's box of random shit (we find out Mitzee is not into girls, and da buttah's mom is a crack head.... a chocolate thong can really bring out the truth in people). The most racial comment is made this year by the wedding party ""Maybe their asses will float back to Africa", which resulted in the NAACP emailing me.... thanks PBC.. Bundy wins the Bundy vs Tanner fight and God and I have a chat.
October - Mom's 2nd box of random shit comes in (Larin Von Smartass cotimplates being gagged "i dont know, if i had a gag ball in my mouth, i think i might be a bit timid"). The wedding party finally comes through with their drinking contest. Snake Eyes and I start talking again. An Amber Alert goes out for white devil and the search begins.... G-lo sums it up best "WD has given us so, so much...." while shane says "if he reunites EMF, i'm gonna kill him myself"
November - I get a dog.... name her Kylie, other dog name suggestions Peril, bailey, twatwaffle, DCD, liability, bluey, and cuntface ... My favorite suggestion from Postmodern Sleaze "She deserves a hybrid of every anglosaxon white female name you can think of. Combine Sarah, Amanda, Jennifer, Jessica and Kristine and you will undoutably come up with the perfect name for the little hussy".......... everyone thinks i went missing until i resurface in December.
December - I resurface from searching for White Devil.. Jenn shows her true serial killer self "Scumbag, I told you he was under my bed. He's lying. Johnny, get your ass back under there. I didn't say you could come out!"So that's the year in review of this blog. Any highlights comments you'd like to point out feel free to let me know, .... Now i'm going to ridiculously drunk and make a new picture to carry in my wallet... and as far a resoultions for this blog... well.. after going to all the old post i noticed that i'm handy at giving advice. Evil, bad, retard, dangerous, unhealthy advice. Starting in 06' people can start emailing me for help and i will give them the best advice i can.
posted by Johnny Menace at 6:41 PM
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