Blind date: Shelly...... part III

Continued from Part I & Part II

The way that little freak monster was sucking on my salted fingers on the way i almost drove of the cliff. We finally pulled up to her place in seattle..... the lights were on.... that was odd i thought... oh well.. must be her caretaker.... i bet she's a black woman named beatrice and she's a katrina evacuee... but i needed to make sure to secure my invitation in...

Menace: *leaning closer to Shelly in the car
That chantilly lace has been driving me wild all night... how did you know i find that perfume intoxicating...

Shelly: *stares straight out the window

Menace: Playing it cool around me.... I knew i shouldnt let EN talk to you before hand.. mind if i use the bathroom before i go... and i'll bring in your breadsticks...
*leans in closer to her deformed ear... or what i thought was her ear
*whispering
...if you want i could feed you the rest of these breadsticks before i go..

Shelly: *smiles and drools on herself

I knew she couldn't play cool for to long and the way she let that drool run down her chest under her shirt..... i knew... my invitation inside was secure..

So i unloaded her from the car.. wheeled her in through the front door... The placed smelled of fabric softner... dyrer sheets were visible everywhere in the house... jesus... what kind of lazy ass caretaker lives here..... we made our way to the kitchen to so i could unwrap the breadsticks and then........ then.. it hit......... it dawned on me why EN told me she was special.....

Menace: So shelly how long have you lived here... its a nice place... smells...... smells.. nice like you live with Snuggles

Shelly: MEEEaahhh Hooooooooome Pretty Giirrrrrl!!

Menace: Yes. Home... so where's your helper.. she live here with you

Shelly: Baby Baby HELP pretty... Pretty GIRLlllll!!

Menace: Baby?.... i don't know .. if i like that...

Shelly:*points at pictures on the counter


Menace:*pics up the picture
Oh........................................ shit.....


Its at that time i finally realized the water was running in the kitchen.... I had been so focused on getting my own breadstick in Shellys super sucking retard mouth that.. i must have ignored
.. "Mommm is that you!"...

Menace: shit.. shit..shit..shit.shit...
*wheeling her in the ktichen

Shelly: BABBYYY WLUVV!! HA Hahahhh!
*claps

Shawn: .........Menace?....... what...

Menace: Oh hey shawn... i.. uhmm

Shawn: .............................. .......... ...........................

Menace: ......................... ....................... .....................

Shelly: MooooooYEaahhhh
*clapping

Shawn: Why are you wheeling my mom in the kitchen?

Shelly: BREAAADSTICK FOR prETTy!!

Menace: Well ..its..uhm... you know EN invited her over .. and.. Mrs Editor was ..uhm.. hungry... am i..
*pulls out a breadstick and feeds it to Shelly

Shawn: No!! My mom was suppose to go on a date.... tell me the date didn't show up and you brought her hom... and why is my mom sucking a breadstick like cock....

Shelly: *Licking the butter of the breadstick end to end and swirling her tongue around it

Shawn: Jesus mom!
*steps away from the sink and snatches the breadstick out
I'm going to kick your ass Men......

Menace: Ah... Shawn... why is there a rubber doll in the sink

Shawn: *looks back
That rubber doll has a name... it's Trish and Trish needs to be washed asshole

Menace: *snaps some pics on his cell phone
That will be worth something don't you think... hate for that to get out at work..

Shawn: Listen douche don't you even think about it.... and what the fuck Menace.. what is this bottle of Patron for.. are you trying to get my mom drunk!!.. She is fucking retarded she can't drink..

Menace: *snaps pics of shawn with a bottle of patron with his mom and doll in the background.
Ok that might make a good x-mas card.

Shawn: Fuck you.. give me those pictures.

Menace: Lets lay somethings out Shawn...

Shawn: No Fuck you.. I'm going to.....

Menace: kick my ass.. yes .. so i've heard.. come on shawn.. big boy breaths.... now listen.. i didn't know this was your retarded suck machine mother... but now that i do.. ....i really.... really want to let her have my breadstick... she's a gifted woman shawn....

Shawn: Well that's not going to happen

Menace: and if you want the pictures to disappear then i'm sticking my breadstick in something.. your mom already got me hard sucking on my fingers in the car.. but .... your the man of the hosue... i'll let you choose...... either i'm tucking her mom in... or your going to have to give me your rubber doll trish for an hour..... someone's mouth is going to get full tonight..

Shawn:..... .......... .........

Shelly: BREADDSTICKKSS YEAaaaHHHh!!
*claps
*drools

Menace: Times ticking shawn..

Shawn: Give me a mintue
*walks over to trish
*leans into her ear
*whispers
*hugs trish and starts to sob a bit

Menace: Sorry Shelly... it would have been magical..

Shelly: *drools
*chews tongue

Menace: I know.. me to..

Shawn *wiping eyes
Ok Menace.. one hour... but that's it.... and here if you could play this CD its her favorite it will help her mind drift away from you...
*hands a type o negative cd

Menace: sorry.. boss... i brought my own..
*flashes a Deftones CD

Shawn: If you hurt her... I'll

Menace: kick my ass?.. don't worry you were believable the first time..... really..

Shawn: .....mom lets go upstairs.. bed time..
*grabs breadsticks and salt shaker

Menace: ........ what... what ..why are you taking those

Shawn: Shut up Menace.. I'll be upstairs for an hour.. and then i'm coming down and you better be gone...
*carries Shelly upstairs

Menace: *grabs the patron
*turns to trish
Why don't we go into the living room and get dirty?

......... 45 mintues later... and an empty patron bottle... I sat on the couch for a mintue to collect my thoughts... I looked over at Trish and wiped away a couple of tears.... there's nothing more innocent than seeing a doll like that shed a tear... ... i should just walk out of here with trish right now... and take her back to EN as a nice little prize for a her blind date set up.... and i know trish would be ready to go after hearing shawn moan from upstairs.....

and you know what... fuck him.. he wouldn't let me fuck his mom..... i am going to steal something...... I could get trish out the door in plenty of time... I've got 10 minutes before he comes down stairs... he's probably napping in his moms lobster claw hands............... then it caught my eye ... sitting in shawn's room ...... a sock monkey...... so i took his sock monkey and made my way out the door... wonder if he'll notice it?